Communicating for a Cause

Uncomfortable in the Quiet

This morning, I found myself stepping over dog toys on my way to the kitchen. I've been picking up toys for what feels like an eternity.

But today there's this crazy, empty kind of feeling as I tossed the toys in the basket. When our children were small it seemed like a constant whirlwind of activity that seamlessly blended from one stage to the next without a moment to catch my breath 

Constant feedings and sleepless nights

Chasing toddlers, trying to keep them out of harm's way

Filling out permission slips; packing lunches

Chauffering from one practice to another 

Late nights wondering if she'll be home in time for curfew 

Hoping he will make wise judgments when away at college 

At first, I was so grateful for the glimpses of quiet that were so few and far between I welcomed them with open arms. I didn't even notice the whirlwind of activity was gradually dying down. 

Until it had just stopped.

And now I only find myself picking up dog toys. 

This empty hole I find in my chest feels so uncomfortable. So peculiar. We got married at a very young age and had our first child immediatley. I went from taking care of my younger brother and sister at home to taking care of my own children. I've never known life without the constant hum of activity. 

And it feels foreign. 

People used to tell me "they grow up in a flash," and I remember thinking how absurd that sounded when the days felt so long. But the twist is the years are ridiculously short.

 

 

Pick up the Phone

If an email exchange seems to be going south.

If you're trying to manage a delicate situation with your teammates.
[ ...Or someone's supervisor ...Or your direct report]

If your email could potentially be read the wrong way.

Pick up the phone.

Often a short investment in time now can avoid lots of confusion, hurt feelings & a derailed project later.

Ten Stages of Speaking at Events

The following dramatization may or may not fully represent the cycle some (*cough*) speakers go through before, during and after an event.

Stage One
Oh wow--this sounds like such a fantastic event! Love the concept. Love the audience. Topic is right in my sweet spot. So honored to be invited. I can't wait.

Stage Two
Bio & headshot? I hate writing bios. Can I send what I've been using for the past decade? Yes, a lot has changed but did I mention how much I hate writing my own bio? Can I successfully extract a decent headshot from this family photo?

Stage Three
Description of my talk? It seems so incredibly far away. (Brainstorm cool title, scratch, rewrite, repeat until the very last moment it needs to be submitted. Scribble description that's compelling, yet vague enough to change the content direction at least 9 million times)

Stage Four
Holy smokes! It's when?!?? What did the description I sent say again? WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?? I'm such an idiot.

Stage Five
Cancel all extracurricular activities. Hole up in office. Stare at blank sheets of paper. Re-read Presentation Zen, Confessions of a Public Speaker and an unhealthy amount of blogs on successful presentations. Why did I sign up for this again? I hate speaking. (Write blog post about the insanity of preparing to speak)

Stage Six
**And then a miracle occurs** (Light bulbs go off. Heavenly choirs can be heard) This is going to be so cool. I can't believe I get to do this as my job. I love speaking. The audience is going to love this. I'm so excited. (Much enthusiasm now around building slides)

Stage Seven
(Day before event) This sounds so stupid. They're going to hate me. I'm tired of hearing the sound of my own voice. Why did I think this is cool? I hope no one shows up.. and all recording devices break so there's no evidence of my ineptness. I wonder how bad it'd be if I left the country for a few days.

Stage Eight
(15 mins before event) I don't believe I should drink anymore Red Bull. Or eat anymore candy, lest I go into a sugar-induced coma. Or talk at a billion mph. What if no one comes? What is the sound of one hand clapping? What if that one hand doesn't even clap? Why isn't Keynote working right???

Stage Nine
(Immediately post-talk) That sucked. I suck. I can't believe people were interested in that. I'm such a poser. The people who followed up were probably just being nice. I should go poke my own eyes out now.

Stage Ten
(After talk) Wow--I can't believe all the great feedback I keep hearing. Maybe it went better than I thought? It sounds like it really helped a lot of people. They want me to come back? Really? Wow. That is so cool. I love my job. 

**Any others we should add?**

5 Questions with Kary Oberbrunner

Recently, I was humbled and honored to be included in Kary Oberbrunner's "5 Questions" interviews with leaders in ministry. If you'd like to see a quick snapshot of how we've gotten from there to here & stuff I stress about, you can find it here.

I was privileged to meet Kary sometime last year when he was getting ready to launch his book, The Fine Line. Fabulous book about being relevant to today's culture without compromising your values. I was really impressed with the book overall which you can read more about here.

Question for you guys-- What irrational fear has held you back from pursuing something God may be prompting you to do?

Focus

For me, the ability to focus can be a huge strength and weakness at the same time. I'm so easily distracted that sometimes [often times] it is difficult to keep at one thing for any given length of time.

But on the flip side, I can get so wholly focused on one pursuit that everything else gets shoved to the side during that period.

I've heard so many people talk about how balancing the two extremes is healthy. Is it really? Is it even realistic?

When I back up enough to see the complete picture, it seems the average of the two extremes I frequently swing between must net some sort of balance as a whole. [Or at least I like to take comfort in telling myself this]

For example, right now I'm in a season of trying to establish some consistent spiritual disciplines in my life. I love the extra closeness that I'm feeling toward God and often want to shove all my chips to the center of the table & cry "all in!" But I'm concerned that in doing so I might quickly grow tired [or worse yet, bored] and wonder instead if I should pace myself more like a distance runner.

Are there focused "seasons" people grow through? Does this thinking apply to organizations as well? Am I supposed to feel bad when a particular season has run its course?

Just some late night musings.

Happy 13th Birthday Amy!

Sweetheart, we are so proud of you. I can't believe you're already a teenager. Er, at least Elvis as a teenager in this shot. We love you!!

Hurdles or Open Doors?

How easy is it for your "customers" to go deeper in their relationship with your organization? Are opportunities to get even more involved and committed intentionally accessible? Not just the get-'em-in-the-door type of intentional, but what about for those already on board?

I just spent [versus invested] a pretty painful amount of time trying to upgrade my Comcast subscription. No dice through my online account [which should have giant "upgrade today" buttons, but alas, no], so I bit the bullet and called the 800 number. Got halfway through the endless prompts aaaand had my call dropped. Tried again, waded through more prompts, sat on hold & finally connected to a service representative. She was friendly and got me set up, at which point the Internet in my bundled service immediately goes down. More teleprompts & disconnected calls.. lather, rinse, repeat. I was so sorry I tried to upgrade.

Contrast this experience to one with a Sirius telemarketer who called earlier today:: I had a 3 month subscription that came with my car and over those few months I came to the conclusion I couldn't live without an All Blues All the Time station ever again. I'm not a big fan of telemarketers in general, but they already had my attention, called when my free subscription was nearly up and made it easy for me to take it the next level. The whole thing took about 5 minutes. No interruption in what I already had, no pain.

"So, Dawn," you say, "enough with the whining. How does this have anything to do with me?"

The best customers are the ones you already have. And they help find new people for you when they become raving fans, which typically happens when the organization invests in them. This can come in flavors like an easy to navigate web site, customer service that goes a little bit further than expected, making exceptions to the "rules" when it makes sense... you get the picture.

And yes, this absolutely applies to churches. Every time someone steps forward to volunteer, get involved with a small group, sign their child up for MOPS, participate in a class, etc., let's ask ourselves, "Did we make that easy or hard for them?" Or better yet, let's ask them.

Long Time No....

Blogging from Dawn. Sheesh. Ordinarily I'd apologize, but have heard from those much wiser than I that's lame.

So where to begin? Wow. A ton has been happening & I've been learning a lot. For instance, on the personal side I've learned:

• There's a limit to how many Christmas lights can be strung together before the fuses blow.
  [good to know BEFORE spending 3.5 hrs putting them on the house.] Very disappointing to plug in the last string & watch them each blow in sequence... And yes, I did check each bulb, Clark

• When baking, accuracy is important. Not enough flour makes for cookies that are impossible to scrape off baking sheets

• Offering to host holiday parties three weekends in a row during the month of December is grounds for insanity. [I have a stockpile of ginger ale leftover if anyone's interested]

On the professional side, I've had a lot of organizations ask me about changing their name lately. Church Marketing Sucks shared the results of a poll they recently did on the same topic

Names are a big deal. Changing a name is even bigger, so I'm planning to dedicate the next couple of posts sharing what we've learned over the years when helping organizations chart through these waters. Specifically:

• Assessing Your Current Name  :: How do we know if it's worth changing or keeping?
• Denominational Affiliation :: Should we include it or go with something more neutral?
• Ideas :: Where do we start?
• Telling Others :: Is there a right or wrong way?

Happy 2007!

Tag--I'M it?

Wow--can't say I've ever been tagged before. I know, hard to believe given my lengthy experience in the blog world. Thanks, Tim! :) All of the memories of being picked last for dodgeball are slipping away. [well, almost]

Okay, jumping in...

• One book that changed your life
  The One Thing You Need to Know by Marcus Buckingham [waiting for the backlash from Tony on this one...]

• One book you've read more than once
  Swim With the Sharks (Without Being Eaten Alive) by Harvey Mackay

• One book you'd want on a desert island
  1,001 Coconut Recipies [yes, I made that up]

• One book that made you laugh
  Just one? Purple Cow by Seth Godin

• One book that made you cry
  The Barbarian Way by Erwin McManus

• One book you wish had been written
  How to Run a Successful Company Serving Innovative Ministries
  [with a special bonus feature on recruiting stellar talent from cornfields]

• One book you wish had never been written
  Wow--not sure I can nail it down to just one.

• One book you are currently reading
  The Long Tail by Chris Anderson

• One book you've been meaning to read
  Naked Conversations by Robert Scoble & Shel Israel

Tag 5 Others: Okay, my biggest dilemma is not knowing who's already been tagged. Are there rules? [Mark, I don't think Four Things Meme should count--this is a book thing :)] Mark Batterson, Kem Meyer, Shawn Wood, Brad Abare & Daryl McMullen

Just to Clarify...

Okay, I'm feeling a bit of pressure to clear the air on this topic. Ever since this blog launched I've been asked multiple times..

"So... how come Tony Morgan's blog looks better than yours?"

(sigh) Okay, yes, "we" helped Tony with his blog. And "we" have stellar capabilities in new media design. But by "we," I mean the amazing creative team... who is insanely busy right now & my blog isn't exactly on the top of their priority list. :)

Which then leads to the next inevitable question--

"But c'mon.. don't you have some kind of pull over there? I mean, isn't your husband leading that team for cryin' out loud?"

Um, yeah. I think the official response was, "You've gotta be kidding me, right?"

But seriously--the organizations they're helping are doing things a LOT more important & I appreciate the patience of all 10 of you who are enduring the cookie cutter graphics. [oh wait, I think there's now 11 since my sister-in-law found it]

And it'll be cool beyond belief when "we" are able to get to it. :)